‘First Aid Kits’ come stuffed with antiseptics and Sesame Street Band-Aids, ‘Black Girl Starter Kits’ come jam packed with hot combs and Michael Kors, and the ‘You Can Beat Me Up, But My Dad Will Sue You’ starter pack is filled to the brim with khakis and penny loafers.
Well, guess what?
The ‘Survival Kit for Maintaining a High Self-Esteem’ comes fully loaded with all things narcissistic and much, much more!
So I’m sure we’ve all had our days …you know, those days where we mope, self-criticize, and loathe over our weight, acne, personality, or some other attribute God made no mistake in bestowing upon us. While we may take subtle joy in our pouty fits and take pleasure in having others attempt to appease our woes, we must remain cognizant of how this apathy only glooms us even more. It’s like reinforcement for our already sullen souls. It’s like feeding the beast we wished to weaken. It’s like reopening a wound that was almost healed. And quite frankly, it’s like self-infliction when you should, in fact, be your BIGGEST cheerleader.
Am I demonstrating ‘tough love’? Well, of course, but I promise it’s only to improve your ‘self-love’. On that note, let’s dive right into your survival kit materials necessary for maintaining a high self-esteem.
1. TWERK your TUMMY
Granted, my sole reason for joining my belly dance troupe wasn’t to boost myself self-esteem. Honestly, I didn’t even realize this artistic expression was capable of such. But as my love for belly dancing grew and grew, the more I noticed how my appreciation of myself, my fellow troupe members, and other women grew to epic proportions as well.
Now even though I think Magic Mike’s crew can’t hold a candle to the wonders of belly dancing, I must admit that belly dancing isn’t the only activity deemed worthy enough to fade away your pangs or inequities you may think exist. In fact, there are plenty of other awesome hobbies and activities you can get into that will render similar results. A few of these include, working out, volunteering, tutoring, dancing, and joining support groups. Besides enjoying the activity itself, be sure to fully immerse yourself in what you’re doing, encourage those around you, and remember to embrace yourself – flaws and all.
2. Read Your Rainbow
“Pure elation” ↵ These are the words I use when asked to describe the joys I feel when I’m able to kick-back and enjoy flipping the pages of my favorite motivational paperback. This is sorta why I’m passing my faves and their sentiments onto you.
By reading books catered to feeding your ego while aiding in your spiritual growth, you not only experience the testimonies of others first-hand, but you are also more inclined to attempt their coping mechanisms since they often face the same issues as you.
If you don’t mind me getting personal…
My freshman and sophomore years of college were consumed with ridicule by my peers and some I even called “friends”. Now don’t get me wrong, I had plenty of fond memories from those years as well, but the unrelenting teasing and body-shaming from others were definitely in the mix.What helped me through were these three books above (Maya Angelou’s Letter to my Daughter, Joel Osteen’s Your Best Life Now, & Dr. Jay Strack’s Transformer Bible). Each, in their own regard, lent comfort and reassurance of the beauty that resided within all the while helping me exude it outward. After taking heed to their instruction, reciting their prayers, and keeping track of the progress I made throughout my journey, I developed a self-love so enduring, even Bieber took a backseat!
I’m not talking the chicken scratch my fellow doctors and I call penmanship! I’m talking about getting out your favorite lippie shade and proclaiming your beatitudes by scribbling them on your mirror, wall, dry erase boards – wherever. Chapstick more your thing? No worries. You can easily scribble using your more creative utensils on the prettiest of stationary. Just be sure to pin it in places you frequent so as you “sashay” past these compliments full of candor, and reminiscent reminders of how wonderful your truly are, you recognize your worth. If you’re clueless as of what to write, try these for starters:
I AM BEAUTIFUL.
I AM VICTORIOUS.
I AM WORTH IT AND MUCH MORE.
From experience, I can tell you that repeating your traits you adore and claiming those you doubt can seem pretty silly especially once you begin. Eventually, however, it becomes pretty routine as you begin to believe what your lips are uttering which, we can’t forget, is the ultimate goal here.
4. #GTOT (Give Thanks on Thursdays)
We all do it. Forgetting our blessings. Aimlessly walking around like we own this joint (Earth) and created everything on it. What’s funny is that we don’t, didn’t, and never will. Therefore, it’s essential that we always remember to give thanks to our Papa Provider for all He’s done despite all that we haven’t.
To help with our ADHD, I’ve created the cutest of jars using some glittery arts and crafts from Hobby Lobby. Purchasing a glistening golden notebook and champagne colored parchment paper to accompany the jar enable me to deposit my blessings each day and document my interpretations of God’s Word. Once Thursday approaches, I twist the lid, sit back, and read each blessing aloud, taking the time to re-thank Papa Provider for His generosity. Realizing all I have to be thankful for helps me love myself and my Man Upstairs while straying from harboring on things that once controlled my thoughts and lowered my self-worth.
So what do you think? Am I the best tip-giver or what? 🙂 If you think you can do better, I advise you to leave your advice below. 😉 It will not only help me, but others as well! We are each other’s pillars and we mustn’t forget this…your encouragement could be the light someone needs when he/she is making their way through their darkest hour.
Remember that if you EVER have trouble loving yourself, STOP hesitating and visit the website below.
Remember to Live Life, Beautifully <3
– Shimmy Sistah